La Mariposa

Yesterday, as I was preparing to mow the back yard, a large yellow butterfly with brown markings caught my attention. I was standing under the citrus tree and the butterfly flew in front of me and hovered at a low branch to inspect a new bud. It fluttered for several moments just a few feet away from me. My eyes filled with tears. I was in the shade on a Friday morning, with the will and the strength to work on the yard, watching a butterfly created by God. It was beautiful.

Besides my commitment to keeping my Dad's lawn pretty, I thought I would talk about where I spend some my time, what I'm doing, and include a few pictures.

This is my oak desk which I bought at Butler's on 8th Avenue in Fort Worth. I miss the huge windows it used to sit in front of at my old apartment. Supposedly, I'm working on a book. That's been a process of fits and starts. This morning, I had a little bit of Holy Spirit conviction because I haven't applied myself to what I know God wants me to do. I wrote most of my dissertation in my little tree fort on Elizabeth Boulevard and I thought that I would find the same sort of drive on Stella Lane. Not so.

I spend a lot of time with this pretty girl, Wimsey. She was mine when she first came into the family, then she became my father's baby, and now she acts like I'm the one again.

After my dad died, my mother let me use a Home Depot gift card he had received for his birthday to buy plants for his flower beds. A friend and I planted the autumn salvia and petunias a few days after the memorial service. I have since become a flower fiend. My best friend, who is a born gardener, told me that "there's always room for another flower." I have taken this to be gospel truth and I am deeply happy when I am looking at the lovely colors in the flower garden. Bugs have started to nibble on the leaves, which I consider trespassing, and I need to figure out what to do about that. I am asking God to spare the plants, to bless the ground and to help the seedlings grow.

I spend a lot of time with this pretty lady. Mom, as was in the family plan before Dad went to Heaven, bought a new car this spring. I got to go with her as she went through the process. We are now, as she says, a Hyundai family.

We turned in Dad's PT Cruiser to Chrysler. I'm not sure what possessed my father to lease a vehicle. He could have owned it outright for what he paid over the course of the lease. Mom would have liked to keep it, but the deal was no deal, and so it went.

Most evenings, I cook dinner for my mother and myself. Tomorrow, we'll have a family meal with sisters and cousins to celebrate Mother's Day.

I will close for now by coming back to the butterfly. After spending six hours in the yard, I saw her again as I was finishing my work. She flew past the patio to the flower garden. I knew it was no mistake that I saw the creature once more. She was a sign of grace, bookending my work, reminding me that God makes all things new in His time.